How To Stop Being Shy & Introverted, My Secret Formula


Although being introverted is not being shy. Remember, not all introverts are shy, and vice versa. The stop being an introvert formula can be valid for both characters.

Introversion is not something we can change. Nor should we feel ashamed about it! This personality trait is integral to who we are, just like an extrovert! I’ve found a system that works for me: by being aware of who I am and who I want to become in life, I was able to open up to the world.

“Welcome to the Successful Introverts’ club!” being an introvert is much fun once we realize that this is who we are, and there is nothing wrong with that. If you feel you are not alone in your struggles, remember that most people are similar!

How setting a goal can limit your introversion?

I remember when I had many responsibilities and struggled to improve my family’s life. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and never thought of the future. I was a kind of live day-by-day guy. No plans, no worries, kind of go to work 8-5 come home and watch tv, play video gamesOpens in a new tab..

We had to go through tough times until we spent every penny, nothing was moving forward, and we were in a very challenging situation that I do not wish any of you to experience. That was when I realized that no one was coming for us to help improve our financial situation.

So I had to choose between heading in the same direction, which led me nowhere, or starting a new path! It didn’t matter what the plan was then, and I had no idea what the final destination would look like.

But I knew that as long as it would provide me with the motivation and determination to get through my old habits, I would do it cause I knew I needed to start to change for things to change. That was the moment I decided to set a goal for myself.

Limit Your introversion by being caring about people

Suppose you are looking for a solution to avoid being so introverted anymore. In that case, that means you are aware that your introversion or shyness is limiting you from achieving whatever you are trying to achieve primarily. It can be a big block not letting us meet new people or even make a deeper connection with individuals we already know in our daily routine.

There is more than one method to get to know someone better. The best way is really and genuinely being interested to know more about the other person, most people like people who are interested in them, I have learned this in my network marketing journey, and I loved it.

People want to talk and talk about themselves about their hobbies, achievements, cars, trips, or even nag about their life. But remember, the goal here is to learn how to control our introverted selves.

Making such a choice may sound kind of weird to us. Why should you talk about all this random stuff with strangers or people we barely know? I feel you, even though I sometimes struggle to chit-chat with my wife when I return home after a working day.

Preparing for conversations with new people will help you learn more about them and ensure the conversation goes smoothly. There are a couple of questions you can prepare in your mind to help you start talking.

It’s a good idea to ask them about their hobbies, interests, studies or work. It can also be helpful to ask what they do outside of work, their family and friends, and their long-term plans.

I do not encourage you to discuss the weather, traffic, politics, and social issues. I don’t discuss these things because they are not the things that bring people together. These topics either put people at odds with others or divides them in some way.

Play the fear of loss game with your mind

It is natural to be afraid of the future and what might happen. Fear of the unknown is called “anticipatory anxiety.” The fear of loss is something we all have experienced somewhere throughout our life.

When living day-by-day, something shows up, and we become afraid of losing everything that we have or might not have in the future.

Life is full of change, and it is natural to fear the unknown. However, sometimes we let our fear take over. We allow our worries to take over and cause us to worry about everything that might happen in the future. It can be good or bad, but we need to remember that worrying does not always mean you are changing your circumstances for the better.

Train your extroverted mind to remind your introverted mind that if we do not work together to make a bit of progress each day, everything will remain the same in 10 years or maybe even get to the point of not returning. We are trying to avoid this if we are trying to control our life completely and not let life control us.

It would help if you embraced yourself as an introvert.

Being an introverted person has its advantages. We tend to be more thoughtful and can focus on one task at a time. We also have a lot of hidden potentials that we can uncover in our journey.

There are several ways for introverts to embrace their inner selves. One way is by being mindful of what we want out of life and setting goals accordingly. Another way is by accepting that we may not be the center of attention and still find happiness in our way.

Here are my final tips on some ways you can try to embrace your inner self:

  • – Be mindful of what you want out of life and set goals accordingly
  • – Accept that you may not be the center of attention but still find happiness in your own way
  • – Seek out opportunities to be around people in order to recharge
  • – Find a hobby that you love, even if it doesn’t make for the best conversation
  • – Don’t try too hard to get people’s attention
  • – Focus on your own interests, talents, and hobbies

Shyness vs Introversion

Melody Jacobs
Blogger & Influencer Melody Jacobs covers her face, posing as a shy person

Introversion is often confused with shyness. Shyness is the fear of being judged by others, while introversion is a preference for solitude and less stimulation. Introverts have a higher sensitivity to external stimuli and can be overwhelmed easily.

There are many misconceptions about introverts that we need to find a satisfactory explanation for it. Introverts have different needs than extroverts but are not inferior or less capable than extroverts.

Meet potential romantic partners

Single!? We all have the thoughts of that one person in our lives that we want to meet but when we see someone who has that potential, we are too shy to talk to them.

Whether it be at work, school, or even on the bus. Here are some tips for making friendships and even long-term relationships with a person you like or have a crush on.

If you are seeing or approaching them for the first time, do not be pushy but be friendly. Being overwhelming from the first time can scare the other person off. Best to keep it short but make sure to connect if you notice a spark between you two.

Compliment people

Complimenting is a great way to connect fast with someone you don’t know or just met for the first time. You can do compliments in public.

The most important rule for an effective complement it has to be honest.

Compliments are nice because they are polite. You can do them in groups, during conversations, and in one-on-one situations, for example, in the elevator. You might complement their hair or outfit, even their purse or accessories.

Smile and say hello

When you notice someone that you like for the first time, it is essential to smile and say hello. Being friendly helps the other person feel more comfortable and like they are welcome in your space. Furthermore, it helps them know you’re warm, which may make them more inclined to want to speak with you.

Start with a question

People love talking about themselves; asking them questions will help you get to know them. The first time I met her, she wore this strange top with a turtle neck. I asked her, what do you like to wear during a workout?

She said I like to wear yoga pants and a sports bra, but then I’ll throw on a zip-up hoodie or sweater if it’s cold outside.

Find out what makes them happy.

Probably the best approach is to get to know the person you’re talking to. Knowing what they do for a living, their hobbies, and other personal details can make the conversation much more effortless. Learning more about what the other person likes will give you something to ask them about, and you will have an idea of what they might want to talk about too.

Share a personal story to bond

So, I was recently at this wedding party and met this lady. She was cool, but we couldn’t find anything to discuss. We were both just standing there awkwardly until she said, “so what do you do?” And then it clicked. I told him that I’m a digital marketer, and she said to me that she’s an engineer!

She asked me how did I start my journey, and I explained to her how I was able to help businesses through my knowledge and that now I am assisting individuals in making a living by learning and using their laptops. And then we were able to talk for hours about the future of tech and how it will change the world!

Text once a week rule through social.

It is crucial to keep in touch with people we have just met and want to build a friendship with. The best way is to stay updated about what’s happening in their lives. We should not just think of it as a task we need to do but also as an opportunity to get closer to them.

We should not just send a friend request or text message once and then forget about them forever. We should send them messages once a week at least and ask how they are doing, what they are up to, and so on.

Make the first step to invite them out.

Taking the first step will help you build a relationship and become friends with them. Invite them to do something that you are both interested in. Tell them what you enjoyed or did in the past. Telling a bit about what you like will show them that you are open to discussion with them. Have a specific question like, “What do you do in your free time?”

Getting to know someone with common interests is effortless once you start asking some basic questions. Then ask them if they would like to do something together that is interesting for both of you. It can be something as simple as watching anime together.

Part 2

Don’t let society dictate who you are

Indeed, introverts are not as vocal as extroverts. They prefer to stay in their comfort zone and are not as likely to go out of their way to talk to people they don’t know.

But introverts are more social than extroverts because they have a close circle of friends, while extroverts have a more comprehensive network of acquaintances. Introverts like solitude and peace, but this doesn’t mean they don’t want to be around people.

They need some time alone after a period of socializing to recharge. We introverts can have more intimate relationships than extroverts because they are less likely to take risks in social situations, which require trust and intimacy.

Remember to ask questions showing interest in the person you are talking to when you are out there, and you will do just fine.

I am open to your comments in the group Successful Introverts’ Club. Come and hang out with me.

Garo Kotchounian

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