How To Start A Conversation With A Shy Girl: 8 Tips That Actually Work

If you’re a guy or just someone who wants to approach a shy girl, you’ll need these tips I am going to share! 

You can start a conversation with a shy girl by giving her a comfortable vibe and showing your sincerity to her. When I say sincerity, it means showing your real intentions to befriend her and help her build confidence, nothing more and nothing less.

There are lots to consider before you approach a shy girl. And you can lose the chance with just one wrong move. 

Likewise, you should know that the shy girl you want to talk about can be introverted. And with this in mind, I made sure that these tips apply to both shy and introverted girls.

8 Tips to keep in mind before starting a conversation with her

How To Start A Conversation With A Shy Girl

Shy girls are intimidating and challenging to approach, especially if you want to kickstart a conversation. But no worries, these tips work!

Start a conversation with her in a public place.

It’s easier to talk to people when they’re around others because they’ll feel less self-conscious and more likely to respond to you.

Likewise, approaching her in public will let her know you’ll not invade her personal space.

For example, if you see her at the grocery store or the coffee shop, don’t be afraid to approach her and say hi! She may be surprised at first, but once she realizes that you’re just trying to make conversation and not trying to hit on her or ask for her number, she’ll probably warm up quickly! And that’s your goal!

Try to use open-ended questions in your conversation.

Open-ended questions allow the person talking to respond with more than one word. It’s important because it will help that person feel more comfortable and allow them to have a back-and-forth conversation with you.

For example:

  • You can ask her why she’s in the grocery store at this hour.
  • You can ask her what’s her favorite coffee and why.

Avoid questions that require a Yes or No answer. They’re boring and will end up your conversation quickly!

Ask her about her hobbies and interests.

Shy girls are often interested in things they can discuss with others, and most of these things have nothing to do with dating or relationships!

So if you find out that your shy girl is interested in art or music, ask her how she got into it. If she likes animals, ask her what kinds of pets she wants to get someday.

The point is this, don’t rush into talking about anything awkward.

Avoid talking about topics that will make her uncomfortable.

Shy people are often afraid of rejection or being judged. That’s why they’re reserved and tend to keep to themselves. But if you want to get them talking, you mustn’t bring up things that might make them uncomfortable. 

That could include anything from religion to politics.

Address her with her name.

Shy people like knowing they’re being acknowledged. They want to feel seen and heard by the world around them, and if you can help them do that by using their name, then it’s easier for them to let their guard down and open up.

If she’s at work or in any other professional setting, don’t just call her “girl” or “hey there.” Address her by name and make eye contact, so she knows you’re talking directly to her.

Compliment her.

A shy girl appreciates it if you tell her how beautiful or nice her outfit is. But if you want to go above and beyond for your shy friend, try complimenting something else about her, like how well-spoken she is or how she handles herself in stressful situations.

Tell her anything that makes her feel good about herself, and let her know that you appreciate all of the amazing things about her!

Approach her with a smile.

It’s not that rocket science, but it works. If she sees that you’re smiling, she’ll feel more comfortable and be more likely to smile back, and then it’s just one small step from there to starting up a conversation.

Another reason smiling works is that she’ll recognize that you’re not there to tease or intimidate her. You’re there because you want to have a nice time together.

Demonstrate your sincerity and politeness through your gestures.

When you first meet her, you should avoid being too forward. Instead, let her know that you’re interested in knowing her by offering her some food or drink.

This shows that you’re interested in making sure she’s comfortable and having fun, not just about something intimate right away.

Avoiding being too aggressive when talking with shy girls is also important.

Another way of doing this is by making eye contact when speaking to them. This shows that you are interested in what they want to share and say and that you are paying attention. It also shows confidence, making them feel more comfortable around you.

Likewise, be mindful of your body language!

  • Avoid crossing your arms or legs.
  • Don’t be stiff.
  • Don’t always play with your hair.
  • Don’t use your phone while talking to her.
  • Have a nice posture.

Confidence is what they need!

If you’ve ever tried to talk to a shy girl, you know it’s not easy. Shy girls are often quiet and tend to keep to themselves. They don’t want to be seen as rude or overwhelming, so they’re hesitant to talk with strangers.

But here’s one thing you should know. Most girls are shy because they lack confidence or can’t start a conversation. If you approach her, you need to have that goal in mind. 

And that is to build that confidence within her by complimenting her and making her talk about the things she loves. Don’t rush anything. Just be sincere about your intention to help her acknowledge herself.

That’s why we’ve put up this guide. It can help you connect with a shy girl in the way she needs! Just remember that all shy girls are relative to each other. That means they’re unique on their own and that you need to understand them first before approaching. This is especially true if they’re introverts.

Garo Kotchounian

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