How To Date? (6 rules of modern dating introverts need to know)

The idea of dating is tricky for introverts, especially today in this modern world. So if you’re an introvert and want to be updated with current dating rules, stick with this post!

You must expect that everything has leveled up in this modern dating world. One fact is that people often use social media, and that’s where you need to begin. 

If you’re ready to date, you need to update your social media profiles by adding pictures of yourself. That’s one way of flexing yourself. Other rules include being on time, avoiding isolating your date, forgetting that you have a phone during the date, and in today’s world, expecting that there will be a split of bills! 

Aside from that, you must commit, so don’t ever try to ghost your date.

Modern dating can be tricky, but with some know-how on handling this as an introvert, you can surely ace it. 

But before discussing the rules of modern dating, you need to know the different phases of dating.

Introvert Girl Ready to Date

Four phases of dating

Dating can be a complex and confusing process. But you need to know that four distinct phases of dating create a path toward a successful relationship. 


This is when people first meet and start getting to know each other. In today’s modern world, this could happen online through social media or dating apps. It could also occur in social groups, communities, or other places where there is a lot of interaction.

That interaction could lead to attraction, which can soon move forward to dating.


This is when people start going on dates and getting to know each other better. This stage includes going out and more meetings. This is also the point where you’ll ask yourself whether that person is right for you. 

The dating stage may last three to four months, depending on the preferences of both parties.


This is when people decide whether they want to be in a committed relationship with each other. This is also where couples try to solve the character problems that may arise. Intimacy is also part of this phase.


It is the deeper phase of the dating process. This is where you’ll decide to get engaged and soon marry each other. 

6 Rules of modern dating

Here are the rules of modern dating that introverts should know for our main topic!

Optimize your social media profiles by adding photos.

If you’re an introvert, chances are you’re not wild about flexing yourself out there on social media. But suppose you’re looking for love or just a little attention. In that case, it’s time to consider optimizing your social media profile, including adding photos.

Here’s why!

In modern dating, potential mates are increasingly likely to see your profile through social media. 

And when they do, they’ll form first impressions based on what they see, including any photos you’ve posted.

So if you want those first impressions to be positive, one way is to put your best foot forward with some great photos.

Do not ghost!

When it comes to modern dating, ghosting is unfortunately all too common. For those who don’t know:

Ghosting is when you suddenly stop talking to someone you’re dating without any explanation. It’s a cowardly way of ending things, and it can leave the other person feeling 

  • Confused
  • Hurt
  • Humiliated

While there are many reasons why someone might choose to ghost, one of the most common is that they’re introverted and find the dating process exhausting. They may also fear confrontation or simply need to learn how to end things maturely.

However, just because someone is introverted doesn’t mean they should be allowed to get away with ghosting.

If you’re considering ghosting someone, take a moment to think how you would feel if the tables were turned. 

  • Would you want to be left without any explanation? 
  • Would you like to be left feeling confused and hurt?

Be on time.

If you’re an introvert, chances are that you’re good at keeping to yourself. But when it comes to dating, being on time is essential, especially if you’re meeting a particular person for the first time.

Here’s why.

  • First impressions matter, and being late can make a bad one.
  • Aim to be punctual if you want to build a good impression on your date. Not only will it show that you respect their time, but it’ll also give them a chance to get comfortable around you before things get too hectic.
  • Plus, being on time shows that you’re reliable, something that’s key in any relationship. 

Don’t isolate your date.

In the dating world, it is often assumed that introverts should set dates in isolated places. This is because they are considered shy and uncomfortable in social situations

However, this is only sometimes the case. In fact, introverts can actually benefit from setting dates in more public places.

There are a few reasons why public places are better for introverts on dates.

  • It can help you feel more comfortable. You will not feel self-conscious or nervous when you are around other people.
  • You will also be able to focus more on your date and less on your own thoughts and feelings.
  • Public places can provide more opportunities for conversation. If you’re feeling shy, you can simply observe the people around you and start a conversation about something that interests you.

This can help break the ice and make a date more enjoyable for both parties.

Forget you have a phone.

This rule simply tells you you must avoid using your phone during a date. There are some reasons why this is such a bad idea. 

  • For one, it’s rude and inconsiderate to your date. 
  • If you’re constantly looking at your phone, it sends the message that you’re not really interested in them or what they have to say.
  • It also makes you seem like you’re not really present in the moment.
  • Using your phone can lead to awkward silences and make it difficult to really connect with someone.

Bill splitting.

In today’s dating world, it is becoming more and more common for couples to split the bill when they go out. This is especially true for introverts, who may not be as comfortable with traditional gender roles.

There are a few reasons why this trend is becoming more popular.

  • First, it allows both partners to feel equal in the relationship.
  • Second, it can help prevent arguments about money later on down the road.
  • Third, it makes sense from a practical standpoint why one person should always have to pay.

Of course, some still prefer traditional gender roles regarding dating and paying bills. But if you want to feel comfortable and good after dating, then split the bill equally and tell your date that you want it that way. 

Modern dating for introverts is a new opportunity for exploration.

You should not fear modern dating if you’re an introvert. You can take this opportunity to explore and discover your potential, likes, and preferences in the dating world. 

Now that I’ve given you some modern dating rules, you can use them as a guide when planning your first date. But if there’s one thing I want you to learn about modern dating, it’s a world where introverts need to cope without feeling any pressure or discomfort.

Modern dating is also for introverts! All you need is preparation and a little knowledge of how dating works! 

Garo Kotchounian

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