How to Deal With Loud Neighbors Without Becoming a Jerk Yourself?


Living in an apartment complex can be significant. You have neighbors but don’t have to worry about maintaining the exterior or mowing the lawn.

However, one downside to living in close quarters with your fellow humans is that sometimes they can be loud…really loud.

If you’re dealing with a neighbor who slams doors, plays music too loudly, or generally makes life difficult, it’s important not to let yourself become just as annoying as them.

This blog post will discuss dealing with loud neighbors without becoming a jerk yourself!

apartments with noisy neighbors

How I dealt with my annoying neighbor!

I moved into a brand new apartment and had to face noisy neighbors. The first month was tolerable, but as time passed, I found that my irritation level began to rise. As an introvert, it is always challenging to willingly meet and talk with the neighbors.

I tried to solve it by talking to them, but it was not helpful. Before too long, I realized there were ways to deal with loud neighbors without acting like a jerk. 

There are ways to go about this in a way that’s respectful of everyone involved.

It’s no fun to live with loud neighbors. I get it

If your neighbor is constantly slamming doors and playing loud music, they keep you awake. It can feel like they’re taking over your space.

First, try talking to them. You might be surprised at your neighbors’ willingness to work with you on this issue. If they don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay! You can still take steps toward getting them to quiet down without being confrontational.

Meet with your neighbor to discuss your concerns.

Suppose the problem is intermittent and not ongoing. In that case, you may want to try speaking with your neighbor before taking any further action.

Simply knock on their door and explain that you are hearing a lot of noise coming from their apartment.

Suppose they make a lot of noise due to moving furniture or slamming doors so hard. In that case, they may be unaware that they are disturbing others in the building.

Tell the loud neighbor you are bothered by the noise.

As you get older, you become more aware of the fact that your neighbors are people, too. This is great because it means that you might be able to talk things out with them in a way that will make everyone happy.

If the noise bothers you more than occasionally, it’s probably time for a chat.

The first step is telling your neighbor why you’re bothered by the noise. You don’t have to be mean or accusatory; simply explain their sound level has been too loud for you lately and how much of a problem this is for you.

They may not know there’s anything wrong! You can also try talking about ways they could change their behavior so that it doesn’t bother you as much anymore (for example, if they have parties all weekend long and there are lots of people coming and going at all hours). You might even be able to come up with some solutions together.

Of course, suppose they don’t agree with your point of view or aren’t interested in working anything out with you. In that case, it’s time to consider some other options from the below sections.

Don’t aggressively confront your neighbor.

If you’re concerned about their and your safety (they could be slamming doors because they’re drunk or high). Consider offering them some help with that at a suitable moment and without being judgmental.

Maybe send them resources for substance abuse treatment centers or mental health services. Or just offer support in whatever way feels right for you. 

The point is, if you make it clear that your concern comes from a place of love and support rather than judgment or anger, you’ll find that most people are willing to open up and talk about what’s going on in their lives.

Be a friend first with Your neighbor.

Having neighbors is a blessing or, in some cases, a curse. They can be your best friends or your worst enemies. You never know who you will get when moving to a new place, especially if you are introverted and would prefer not to interact with your neighbors that much.

The first step to getting along with your neighbors is to get to know them. This will reduce tension if any conflicts arise.

Introduce yourself and establish some kind of rapport with them, even if it’s just in passing. Smiling whenever you come across each other is the best way to show friendliness all the time.

After a while, if you are bothered with something that they are doing, like they watch TV and listen to Music very loud, or slam their doors all the time. You will at least have a friendly appearance when you confront them with the issue.

How do I politely ask my neighbor to stop slamming doors?

It is a difficult situation when you have a neighbor who is slamming doors. You might feel like they are not respecting your space and that they are being inconsiderate. 

Being polite when asking them to stop is essential, as it can be a sensitive topic for some people.

An excellent way to start the conversation is with, “I’m sorry if I’m bothering you, but I wanted to ask you about something.” Then explain how the noise from their door slamming has affected your sleep or concentration.

What to say to a door-slamming neighbor.

Hey John, I hope you are doing well. I’m sure you don’t mean to slam the door so hard each time, but it’s been really loud and disruptive for quite a while now. I’m not sure if this is something that can be fixed, but it would be great if we could figure out a way to make the sound of the door closing less jarring.

I would explain to them precisely what it is, making me very uncomfortable, and ask them if they could please not do it anymore. 

I would even offer to buy a door slam preventer for their door so that they don’t have to worry about how hard or gentle they are closing the door.

Find out if other neighbors are bothered too.

If you’re the only one bothered by loud neighbors, there’s a pretty good chance that it’s not a problem for anyone else.

If you live in an apartment building, check with your neighbors to see if they’re bothered by the noise too. If so, try to find out if it happens at certain times of day or night.

This could help you determine what time of day is best for addressing the issue with management.

If all your neighbors say they don’t mind the noise and aren’t bothered by it, then you may just have to deal with it until something changes. Remember: no one likes being annoyed!

Call the landlord/property manager for help.

When problems with the noisy neighbor continue, and all the above methods do not work, don’t try to handle them yourself. Instead, move to the next step, and call the landlord or property manager for help.

No one wants to be the person who complains about their neighbors—and it’s tough when they’re loud and disturbing your sleep, which isn’t exactly a rare occurrence. But you have options if you’re dealing with this kind of situation!

First and foremost, go to your landlord or property manager as soon as possible. They can help you determine your rights and what kind of action you should take.

They may also be able to mediate between you and your neighbor so that everyone gets some peace and quiet at night.

If all else fails, consider talking to them directly about their behavior. This can be difficult if there are language barriers in play or if they are acting aggressively toward you.

But if there is no other option available, it’s worth doing! If nothing else works after that point, though… well… maybe it’s time to escalate things.

Do I need to call the police if my neighbor is loud?

It is always easy to call the police on an annoying neighbor, but I believe it should be your last choice as it will ruin any long-term relationship with your neighbor.

I want you to try to work things out with this loud neighbor, especially if you own your home or rent it for the long term.

We don’t want an enemy living next door, be smart humans need each other, and there will be a day when you will have to ask for this neighbor’s help or support, so always let the police be your last option.

Contact your local government agency or police department for help if all else fails. They’ll be able to advise you on other steps you can take if this continues.

Do I Have Any Rights Against My Neighbors?

The laws in each city are a bit different and a little complicated. You may have rights against your neighbors, but you may not.

The law says that if you are disturbed by noise or other nuisances from your neighbors, you can take action to stop the disturbance.

As a general rule, if your neighbor is interfering with the use and enjoyment of your property, then you have an actionable claim against them. This is true even if they are on their own property, not yours.

Move if you can’t find a way to peacefully coexist with your noisy neighbors.

If you’re finding it difficult to live peacefully with your noisy neighbors, your best option may be to move. It’s not always possible, but if you can find a new place to live that is more accommodating, it may be the best solution for all parties involved.

Finding peace and quiet can be challenging when you live in a noisy environment. You might not be able to afford to move, but if you can, it might be the best option for your sanity!

Garo Kotchounian

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